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Generally speaking, wearing rings is based on three things. Which Finger Do Most Single Guys Wear a Ring on?.And don’t forget to share that information with other gay and lesbian couples you know who are determining how best to handle the “ring thing. If you do have a great phone call, make sure you catch the name of the associate you spoke to, so that you can work with the right person when you go to the store. They may be great, or you may encounter an awkward pause, or even outright homophobia-but at least you are dealing with it on the phone rather than face-to-face. Call around ahead of time to gauge the attitude of your local jewelers about working with same-sex couples. Whatever ring option you choose, walking into a jewelry store with your fiancée or fiancé looking for a wedding band can be intimidating to say the least, particularly if you would like a nontraditional band. In my experience, couples who have been together for a long time are less likely to have had a traditional “pop the question” proposal experience, and hence less likely to buy or give engagement rings. Conversely, many couples that wear rings as a symbol of their relationship choose to pick out new wedding bands together-bands that symbolize the next chapter in their lifetime journey. In many cases, gay and lesbian couples have been together for so many years that they already own rings that symbolize the permanence of their relationship, and those are the rings that they will continue to wear after their marriage. In this case, the engagement ring will often double as a wedding band. In my observation, many men will wear only one ring, not two.
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My engagement ring doesn't have a stone (my choice), so my engagement ring is now on the ring finger of my right hand, and my wedding band is on the ring finger of my left hand. This is very common, and of course, traditional. For example, my wife Jen, like many lesbians, wears her engagement ring and wedding band next to each other on the same finger. I’ve found that younger lesbian brides (typically those under 40) are likelier to wear two rings.
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I’ve seen femme lesbians present their butch partner with cufflinks instead of an engagement ring-a very cool idea. I’ve noticed that many lesbian couples don’t want a “rock”-a big diamond engagement ring. I’ve seen rings that are mirror images of each other, rings that had a fingerprint imprinted on them, simple platinum or steel bands, and rings that were formed from family jewelry. It’s better to know what your partner likes so you can be prepared. If you and your partner are talking about marriage, don’t be afraid to have a conversation about the ring. While there is no standard “gay-engagement ring” or “gay-wedding band,” this can, however, be one of the first areas where you as a couple express your personality through your wedding. Photo: Larry Fagala - Jewelry: Zadok JewelersĪ common question many gay couples have is, “Does the person who was proposed to have to ‘propose back’ with a ring?” With gay and lesbian couples, there’s no right answer about who proposes, who gets a ring, and what that ring looks like. LGBT Marriage: Buying, Giving and Wearing Wedding Ringsīy Bernadette Smith, owner of 14 Stories | Make Favorite